The Northwest Voice

I have a friend named Richard who is caring for his very sick mom. I want to write about him here because his dedication is admirable — any of you who have been in a caregiver situation surely know how stressful and draining it can be at times, even though you love your parent so very much.  

He has made this choice willingly, he was not pressured into it. His mom could have been situated in a nice nursing home or assisted living complex with other seniors. Instead, he stays with her so that she has the comfort of being at home, surrounded by things she knows and loves as she lives out the rest of her life here.  

He shares his feelings with a group on a caregivers' board that has people who also are going through similar experiences and feelings.  He tells me that it helps tremendously to do this. It's not that his real life friends don't understand and offer support, they do, but somehow, he says that it is just very comforting at times to vent and chat with those who absolutely know firsthand what he is going through and doing as a devoted caregiver. Sometimes, they get outsiders there who bash them for venting, mock them as martyrs or try to demean them for having a "cushy life" just staying home all day caring for one person. Those who do this or say things like that are ignorant of how much devotion, time and energy it takes to be a caregiver and I wish they wouldn't make negative judgments of others until they walk that proverbial mile in their shoes. God willing, though, they will never have to do this.

I want to say "thank you" here to all of you out there who have taken on the huge role of caregiver to a loved one. Even if the one you are caring for doesn't always recognize you or seem to appreciate you, in your heart, you know you are loved just as much right back. There is truly a special place in heaven for caregivers.