I was laying in bed last night trying to get to sleep, when I started thinking about how our youngest daughter seems to remember things from when she was two years old, or has she heard us speak of different  circumstances and then thinks that they are her own memories? 

I know for a fact that the first memory I have is from 1968, I was 5 years old living on 7th street in Grover City, Ca. (renamed Grover Beach to increase tourism...I guess it worked?)  Anyway, our oldest daughter seems to remember when she was four years old going to the thrift shop with my mom.   She also remembers being in a church play around the same age.  Okay, realistic, but having a memory at two?  Is this possible? 

I don't know about you, but my childhood was not the most positive, but then again, who had the perfect childhood?   I know I blocked out alot of yelling but also remember alot of it too, but therapy has helped me to be "okay".......at least that's what I tell myself! 

So, I would like to ask all of you readers:  At what age do you honestly remember something significant?   Be honest now, is it your memory or are you borrowing it?

I tell our daughters that the only person they have full control of is themselves and that the choices that they make will ultimately have consequences, they may not see those consequences right away, but will in time...............In God's time.

I am turning 45 years old in 3 months and 3 weeks, just in case somebody wanted to send me a card, and I am finally at a point in my life where I am enjoying learning from my mishaps...and Lord knows I have many! 

Every single day I learn something new about life and my desire is to share my new found life experiences/moments with my family...it's just getting their full attention that I need help with.  :0) 

I blog here at the Northwest Voice to do the same thing...hopefully people see that whatever I write, I write with all of my heart and do not do so just to be typing, but to share a part of myself with people that I may never meet and maybe, just maybe, something I write will help somebody with a similar situation or make somebody say, "Hmmm, I never thought of it that way!" or maybe give you a chuckle....whatever the case, I am enjoying my time..........In His time.................

It's already July 15, 2008..............where has the summer gone?  Three weeks of summer school, 5 days of vacation bible school, 10 days of vacation with my family, 5 days of church camp...upcoming:  5+ days of performing arts camp at our church and finally...another vacation with my family for a full 7 days............much needed!

I feel extremely drained, physically, emotionally and for some reason spiritually.  Our Senior Pastor of Christ Church of the Valley, Michael Foutz, preached on "religion" and the perils of churches focusing too much on being religious rather than having the personal relationship with God.  That has been heavy on my heart for many months! 

I want so  badly to live my life according to how God wants me to live and I feel like I have been busy with the "stuff" that is interfering with me finding a sincere inner peace.   I pray earnestly that God will show me what He wants me/our family to do, rather than what our needs are.

I will be still and wait for His calling and until then, I am going to slow down and listen....something that we believers tend to have a hard time doing.  Being busy doesn't get us closer to heaven, our hearts are what God wants, not a busy day planner.

What happened this weekend that people forgot their social manners and maturity for that matter.  On two separate occasions in the Northwest Promonade, I was witness to the same type of behavior that is inexcusable...rudeness and downright social immaturity.  I could not believe it when a grown woman repeatedly bounced in a booth to make it uncomfortable for me.  On the third time, I turned around and said, "This is not funny", while they laughed.  We left shortly after that; however, the woman and her daughter continued to laugh and stare as we walked out.  I prayed for them that there hearts would be softened.

Today, we were leaving Walmart for our monthly birdseed purchase, (I could be called the bird lady due to all of the birds we feed in our backyard).  Anyway, as we were getting into our car we heard yelling and cussing.  A grown woman (no, not the same one from the booth) was yelling at a man in a truck while a younger woman in her 20's was yelling out the back window.   Foul language and social immaturiy go hand in hand, but this took the cake.  I so wished I had my video camera to You Tube it, but then again, they would probably find out where I lived and stalk me or sue me for pain and suffering or something else their attorney would congure up.  Again, I prayed for these people that there hearts would be softend.

My husband and I had a conversation about these two incidents and I told him that I felt that we are living in a society where people are "excusing" such behavior and just going on there own way......am I right?  I am a strong believer that treating people how you would want to be treated is on the top ten of positive social behavior, but what is happening?  Is it just me?  Is there somewhere where people truly treat one another properly?????  Oh yeah........................Heaven!

Our eldest daughter just received her driving permit.  My husband and I each took her, at different times, to our church parking lot to let her get used to being behind the wheel.  My husband was giving her tips on the three point turn and  parellel parking; whereas, I was giving her advice on not looking in the mirror while driving, not looking nervous while driving and my favorite driving advice...the proper driving waves.  How to give people the thank you wave, hello wave, go ahead wave and what are you thinking "wave"......well not so much. 

On a serious note, I got out of the car at one point of our "driving instruction" and had her drive by herself, (praying each second, of course) and as I watched her drive off I realized that this moment will never come again.  This moment of watching my daughter drive off right before my eyes will forever be in my mind. 

She will be a junior next year and I can still remember watching her on her first day of kindergarten.  Oh how the years go by!  Cherish  each moment....... they will vanish right before your eyes.

For the past 2 - 3 years, I have been having problems sleeping.  At night, when everyone else is snuggled in their beds, I am thinking of things to do the following day, or things I should have done.  I get up numerous times to read, watch television, get a glass of milk, but to no avail........I AM STILL AWAKE!

Several months ago, I decided to switch sides of the bed with my husband.  For several weeks, it helped.  It was all a placebo!  I am not changing back due to the fact that my husband is sleeping better now. 

During the day, I get so tired that I can't sit for too long or I will fall asleep.  At night, I tell myself that I am going to sleep better since I am so tired.  Guess what?  I am at our kitchen table now blogging, so that positive thinking technique didn't work. 

I have tried sleeping aids; however, I don't want my body to become so dependent on them; however, I believe that I need to do something since the brain cells that I have left aren't being replenished by R.E.M. sleep. 

Anybody have any advice?  OR if you have trouble sleeping too, maybe we can start a support group.  Our meetings would be short,  since we all would need to nap.

I received a phone call yesterday from our daughters teacher letting us know that she was proud of her for standing up for a friend when no one else would. U.G.E.S.D.S: Upper grade elementary school drama syndrome is what I have named it. (everything else has a syndrome, so why not make a new one up?)

As I was reading my bible study today, I came across a verse in Matthew 12:33 "Either make the tree good and its fruit good, or else make the tree bad and its fruit bad; for a tree is known by its fruit." (The Inspirational Study Bible-Max Lucado New Kings James Version) 

Isn't it true that we are producing fruit when we raise our children, and what a joy to know that people are seeing the sweetness of this "fruit"?  I am not saying that our fruit has not tasted sour at times.  As the saying goes:  The apple doesn't fall far from the tree, and we all have our "sour apple" days.

So, regaradless of bad days, if we as parents teach our children the difference between good fruit and bad fruit..............can we possibly have a nice fruit salad at the end of the day? 

St. Patricks Day-A day for the irish.....although I am cooking cornbeef, cabbage and potatoes as we speak, I long to be able to embrace some culture that was in my family background, but the only culture that was ever spoken about was the band Culture Club from the 80's. 

You see, I am what my family calls "Heinz 57", meaning our family comes from so many different types of bloodlines that when doing a family tree, my cousin had to use enough trees to make a housing developement.  Seriously, we cannot find true culture in my family background.

What is a 44 year old woman to do with no culture?  I can't purchase it, I can't make it up (I could but my family would call a therapist)  I will just settle for being me....a happily married, mom, daughter, sister, aunt and cousin to numerous other family members who are in the same boat as I am......lacking culture but we have eachother................

I read an article in the Bakersfield Californian several days ago about the owner of the empty home that was used for party central by numerous teens.  The owners decision not to press charges baffled me.  He stated in the article that he took the beer back, but returned several other items to them.  WHAT?  Okay, I look around the neighborhoods and high schools and see kids driving brand new vehicles, wearing $250.00 pairs of jeans, carrying designer handbags and think...what are they going to want when they graduate?  Hold these kids accountable for their actions!  So they won't like you, who cares!  They WILL get over it, and if not......who cares!  I am so incredibly fed up with parents NOT parenting, allowing their relationship with their kids to be that of a buddy and not a parent!  No wonder our society is the way it is!  Okay, I'm done................for now.  Thanks for reading and putting up with my "venting".

I homeschooled our eldest daughter.   Her homeschooling experience was short lived...very short...2 days.  I am a very patient person; however, my ability to actually teach her/challenge her was left to the teachers.  Don't get me wrong, we teach our children on a daily basis and are very involved in their schooling/education.  We have confidence in the public school system and our daily involvement has enabled our girls to become honor students and most importantly, well mannered, positive citizens of our our community.  What I am very concerned about is the government telling parents that they CANNOT teach their children at home.  I know many homeschooled children and while they are not  schooled outside of their home, they are honor students and are involved in extra curricular activities which enable them to interact with their peers.  What is next?  Is the government going to tell us where we take our children to church, what movies we can take them to, what types of clothes we buy them???  We need to stand up for our rights!  We need to band together, regardless of what political party we are.  It is time for parents to be parents and stop depending on the government and the schools to raise our children.  It is our God given right  to raise these children up to become law abiding citizens, positive role models and we need to be positive role models to them and not rely on others to raise them!  They say it takes a village, well............you need to start in your own "village" first!